Jon Bratton's

Childrens Dancing Poem for a Tap Show Finale

but, first...

I've been writing verses
For 60 years...phew!
And d'yer know why I did it?
T'was especially for you

Jon Bratton

Childrens Dancing Show
Get off, get off you 'orrible lot
Now it’s my chance
D’you know mums and dads they wouldn’t let me sing
And they wouldn’t let me dance

I’m very good at dancing y’know
And I’m ever so keen
But they wouldn’t let me
Cos’ they’re so ...... mean

It’s cos they’re jealous, I’m more mature
I’ve got things in me vest
I’m a sophisticated lady
O’er what’s happened to me chest?

Anyway - even if I wasn’t in the show
I don’t care
Cos I thought the show was ‘orrible
So there

F’instance two girls that were really ‘opeless
I’m very glad to say
Were Leila and Katie
In 'Anchors Away'

Come on down girls and take yer bow
Of course I was bored
Mums and Dads, if you thought they were really boring
Don’t applaud

Here is a part I played in a Childrens Dancing Show where the children were told a special person would make an appearance. I was asked to do a comedy verse routine at the end of the dancing and I dressed up as a petulant woman/child who, having been left out of the dancing, asked the Moms and Dads not to applaud (Apologies for the sound and vision quality of the video clip)

Childrens Dancing Poem for a Tap Show Finale

The next bit was even worser
With all them silly Gene Kellys
If you were 'Singing in the Rain'
Ye should have worn yer wellies

Getting wet were
Mae, Julie, Joana and Kerri
Annan, Sharon and Danielle
and Lesley, Brooke and Katie Servis
Oh and Katie Nelson as well

Come on down girls and take yer bow
Your dancing was like the weather
Mums and Dads, if you thought they were a load of drips
Don’t put your hands together

'Bye Bye Blues' was next
That put me in a rotten mood
Two girls who couldn’t dance for toffy
Were Susan and Carla Oud

Come on down girls and take yer bow
Your dancing should be banned
Mums and Dads, if you thought they were rotten
Don’t give them a hand

Leila Nicholson did it again in 'Desdemona'
I could have done it betterer than you
Mums and Dads, if you didn’t like her jazz
Give ‘er a nice loud boo

Childrens Dancing Poem

Laura Baird and Sharon Craig’s dancing
Made me shed a tear
They ought to be over the rainbow
Anywhere, but ‘ere

Come on down Laura and Sharon, take yer bow
Your dancing was a good chance for me to have a nap
Mums and Dads, if you thought Laura and Sharon were ‘opeless
Don’t give them a clap

'42nd Street' was rotten
And I hated 'St Louis Blues'
And Katie Servis and Leila Nicholson had no rhythm
They should have worn tap shoes

'It Don’t Mean a Thing' featured Kriston
What an awful sight to see
It was a good title though
Cos it didn’t mean a thing to me

Come on Kriston, take yer bow
Your dance never got off the ground
Mums and Dads, if you thought Kriston was yukky
Don’t make a clapping sound

All the boys wouldn’t let me dance, as well
Now it’s my turn to get even
With Jonathan, Ian, Sameer and Naeyl
And Sujath and Barry and Steven

Come on boys take yer bow
D’yer know you’ve all got knobbly knees
Mums and Dads if you thought 'New York, New York' was ‘orrible
No clapping, if you please

Childrens Dancing Poem

Well I think I’ve got to admit the Mums and Dads liked you
But just you wait and see
Mums and Dads please show ‘em all
What you think of me

I think I’ve got it all wrong
I think I’m beginning to see
If I am nice to all of you
Will you be nice to me?

Oh look there’s still four kids left
These four did ever so well
Mums and Dads, please give an ‘and
To Joanna, Chrissie, Jennifer and Annabel

I hope you all forgive me
For being rude, I’m sorry
And now it’s time for us to say
Hip Hip Hooray for Dorry

Come on Dorry

On behalf of all the children
And the parents too
You give us such a lovely show
We’ve got some things for you

Where’s the flower arrangement?
Did you bring the pressies in?
These are for you from all of us
Everyone chipped in

Dorry you did a marvelous job
It really was a nice show
Mums and Dads, Boys and Girls
Let’s hear it for the Maestro

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