Welcome to our?free online printable Womens' Birthday Verses Poems page,?which brings you verses, poems, quotes, messages, greetings, wishes suitable for women's birthday greetings cards, myspace comments, speeches, etc.
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THESE ARE PERSONALISED VERSES WRITTEN FOR SPECIFIC PEOPLE BUT THEY MAY BE USED AS A SOURCE OF INSPIRATION WHEN SEEKING A VERSE FOR SOMEONE WITH SIMILAR HOBBIES, HABITS, TRAITS, CHARACTERISTICS.

ALWAYS FEELS THE COLD / HATES CATS / UNTIDY IN THE KITCHEN / ALWAYS MAKES CURRIES



My love for you, on a scale of 1 to 10
Is a 10, my darling Jill
While your love of cats, on the self same scale
Measures precisely NIL

In your Antarctic scarf and woolies
You always look so good
But freezing cold, I think you need
A?few more pints of blood

Your exploits in the kitchen
Are such a sight to see
And?I really love your curries...
...for breakfast, lunch and tea!!

But it's chaos when you're cooking
You're such a messy pup
If vandals got in your kitchen
They'd probably tidy up

I hope you like this ditty
For your special birthday wish
Or would you prefer a hot water bottle
And a nice new caserole dish?

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KEEPING FIT / MUSIC / LOVES PASTA / CURRY / DOG CALLED BOBBY / NOSEY / TALKS A LOT


Gemma and Bobby are the best of pals
Such an inseparable pair
One has such a nice cute face
The other's covered in hair!

Bobby loves keeping fit
And the latest music sound
Gemma has a cold wet nose
Or is it the other way round?

Bobby's very nosey
And yaps all day long
Gemma never says a word
Or have I got that wrong?

Bobby's had a crush on me
Ever since he was a pup
Gemma likes to lick my face
Or have I got mixed up?

This tribute's for a birthday
A special one that's true
It's for the Pasta and Curry Kid
Bobby is that you?

Lots of love etc

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KEEN JUNIOR HORSE RIDER / FAVE HORSE WAS BOBBY / WON FIGHT AGAINST BOY


Remember all those years ago
When we used to go to Hannah's
You hoy'd a kid over a wall
Cos he didn't show good manners

Poor kid didn't know what hit him
It came as quite a shock
When he gave some lip to the Warrior Queen
Tarz- Anne, the Marsden Rock

You really loved two Roberts then
And you married one, of course
But do you often now look at Rob
And pine for Bobby, the horse?

As a?busy working wife and Mum
With a hectic life, no doubt
When you tidy and clean, do you often think
Of the stables...mucking out?

But enough of this nostalgia
Life begins now, they say
Down a few pints at the Rattler
And enjoy your special day

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BORN IN 1953 / FORGETS TO WATER HOUSE PLANTS / KEEN READER / CUTS FAMILYS' HAIR

For your birth, they held street parties
The whole country just went mental
T'was in '53... the Queen was crowned
But that was incidental

You drink in TV movies
You've a thirst for books, that's true
Our house plants know the feeling
For they get thirsty too

Having an in-house barber
We think is very good
We save some dosh...and we don't mind
The occasional sight of blood

But your love of Jane Austen books
Gives us our greatest fear
While you cut our hair, steeped in Pride
You might Prejudice our ear

But enough of all these insults
For now the time has come
To tell you that we love you
You're a special wife and Mum

Happy b? etc

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LIVERPUDLIAN / CAT LOVER / SOLICITOR / PERNOD DRINKER / BIG BUSTED


Does Jan like to take a drink?
Was Hitler fond of war?
Give 'er a bucket of Pernod
She'll sup it and ask for more

On holiday she goes topless
The Spaniards don't want it done
They fear if Jan removes her top
She might eclipse the sun

For Jan has reached a milestone
As best as we can guage
She's joined the over 40's
In bust as well as age

To a cat loving soliciting Scouser
Who seeks an overall tan
Have a great 40th birthday
We love you Auntie Jan


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OBSESSIVE AT HOUSEWORK / GOES OUT ON THE TOWN WITH GIRLS FROM WORK / PASSED HER DRIVING TEST>>>BUT NEVER DROVE


Happy Birthday Margaret
You've reached the big Four - O
You're getting old so it's OK
If you start running slow

You can quit Sunday morning hoovering
You can stop being so keen
To tidy up and decorate
Polish, scrub and clean

You can quit suppin' G & T's
Or "Deli- Babing" round the town
You can settle down and be "Old Madge"
In shawl and dressing gown

You can get fat and help the folk
In the "Food Giant" queue
When they wonder where the name came from
They can just look at you

You can finally quit driving the car
You can look like a bloke ..so butch
You can do anything...it's OK by us
Cos we love you very much

Happy 40th etc

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Card by Jak

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KEEN TENNIS PLAYER / CYCLIST / ALWAYS LATE / LOSES KEYS



Isn't it Odd?

This is a special birthday tribute
And we really hope to please
But isn't it odd that a prison worker
Should keep mislaying keys?

And isn't it odd that a co-ordinator
Should be always late, not soon
And that a girl born in September
Should have the name of June?

Isn't it odd, since she likes tennis
That she hasn't had this thought
To combine the game with cycling
To help her round the court?

But it's not odd we love her
When all is said and done
She's a lovely caring person
To a husband, daughter, son



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KEEN SPORTS WOMAN / KNOWN AS THUNDER THIGHS / DISORGANISED / WORKS ONLY 5 HOURS PER WEEK


In doing this birthday tribute
It's tempting to take a rise
By using words like "Scatter Brain"
Or even "Thunder Thighs"

But that's not fair, you're an athlete
Fine toned body, well honed mind
A jogging, squash and tennis ace
Unique, one of a kind

You're well organised, and we say that
Not with tongue in cheek
Your work schedule's very hectic
5 hours...every week

You're not at all like a 40 year old
And we mean what we say
Mind you being a Jim Reeves fan
Is a dead give-away

We're glad that we weren't tempted
To be sarcastic or mean
Have a really smashin' 40th, Jan
From Glyn, Joanne, Maureen

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SMALL / KEEN DANCER / NICKNAME "REET PETITE" / GOES TRUCKING WITH FIANCE / WORKS AT OLD FOLKS HOME


Easington's answer to Naomi Campbell
Once did a modelling night
You were just like her, except for style
And colour and looks and height

As a dancer you've got an advantage
Being a "Reet Petite"
Cos it's such a tiny distance
From your brains to your feet

Truckers like a tasty morsel
When travelling near and far
So fiance Jim takes you along
His human Yorkie Bar

And tho' you're now very old
We never hear you grouse
We think it's cos you've already booked
Your place at Moor House

But as it's your 50th birthday
We'll knock the insults on the head
After all you're such a "Nice Girl"
It's true, we've heard it said

Lots of love from all the other "Nice Girls" etc

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80 year old IRISH MOTHER OF 7 KIDS


As it's your 80th birthday
Let's face it, Mum, you're old
We all agree that it's time
You had?your story told

First you had a little girl
And you called her?Ann Marie
Then twins,?John and Sinead
And already you had three

Like Oliver Twist you wanted more
So who was next to arrive
More twins?Ryan and Katie
The number's up to five

By now the stork was worn out
On more he wasn't keen
As?encouragement you gave him a Pat
Then along came Eugene

Of course Eugene says he's the best
You'd produced six times before
But in truth the stork took a look at him
And said "That's it ..no more"

You've been a busy lady
For life, you had a thirst
Giving your all for your kids
And you always put us first

But now that you've reached eighty
You're content and so serene
This comes with love from Hannah
And?Shauna and Eugene

And your whole extended family
On your birthday have a ball
Ruby, you're a treasured gem
So precious to us all...


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Sue, you're a kleptomaniac
You know you shouldn't oughta
Nick the ashtrays from the pub
That's not nice for a vicar's daughter

Still, it's only the odd pub ashtray
That should be underlined
But your love of guns is worrying
Is armed robbery on your mind?

Since you're stroppy...and a good shot
Perhaps I'm going too far
But...are those secret driving lessons
Cos you need a getaway car?

But Sue there's more to you than crime
As anyone can tell
Based on the booze you can put away
You're an alcoholic, as well

Enough of this, it's your birthday
So here's a tribute all in rhyme
It comes with love from Derek
Your loving partner... (in crime)
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CLICK HERE FOR?WOMENS' VERSES and POEMS??in?Imag-e-nation's ?iSpace Craft?Community
(a collection of verses sourced by the Forum users)

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To the most glamourous woman in Guernsey
Whitley Bay is miles away
You're a cracker for a 50 year old
Enjoy your special day

But what to get you for your birthday?
Well, since you're a drinking nut
We considered a nice new liver
But the Butcher's shop was shut

Picking the perfect pressie, Pet
Was such a difficult choice
What you really need, can't be bought
A brand new singing voice

So what about designer clothes?
There's a thought that needs correction
Why even Calvin Klein
Envies your collection

We considered a posh car for you
Or a cruise to an Arctic Isle
To hell with the expense-we got you this
A unique framed up smile

Cos you're so very dear (expensive) to us
Let your hair down, have a Cola
Mixed with a gallon or two of booze
With love ....James and Nola

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